What is caregiver stress? It’s a simple concept to anyone who has ever been a caregiver- it is hard work. Whether you are caring for someone with dementia, with cancer or other debilitating illnesses, or just with the frailty that often accompanies getting older, it is very difficult to manage someone else’s wellbeing as well as your own. There are so many emotions that accompany becoming a caregiver- you want to protect the loved one who now needs your help, you want to make sure they are comfortable and well provided for.
But the time it takes to care for another person often takes time away from other duties- caring for the rest of your family, caring for your household and finances, an outside job, and ultimately, caring for your own health and wellbeing. How can one person begin to balance all of these responsibilities?
Well, there are small things, and some bigger steps, that can be very helpful. Today, we are going to list some of those and hopefully help you get started on the path to feeling a little more in control of the situation you and your loved one are in.
1. Get help. It can be as simple as asking your sibling to watch your parents for a change, or as structured as hiring a caregiver to come in the home so you have a few hours a week to yourself. But don’t overlook other sources of help either. Many senior centers have programs where you can drop off your loved one for a while and the have the chance to run errands or take some time out for yourself. There are also adult day care programs that can be helpful (but sometimes more pricey). If you belong to a church or other house of worship, that can be a significant source of help as well. Often there are members who are willing to volunteer to watch your loved one a few hours a week. Check out our resources page for sites that can put you in touch with support groups in your area.
2. Make sure you are taking care of yourself. This may involve a little of step 1 ( see above) in order to make this happen, but make sure you are keeping up with your own health care, making it to your needed doctor check ups, getting a reasonable amount of activity and nutrition. You’ve heard it before, but how will you care for your loved one if you don’t take care of yourself?
3. Understand the battles that need to be fought- and the ones that don’t.
Part of caregiving successfully is understanding what needs to be done, and what may not be realistic. For example, though difficult, ensuring your demented loved one does not drive him/herself is very important. Making sure they remember what day of the week it is may not be as important. Gentle reminders and not allowing yourself to get too frustrated by something your loved one cannot help can be a very useful way to take the stress off yourself as well as your loved one
4. Know when to talk to your doctor. If your stress is getting too difficult to handle, or may be taking a toll on your own health, it’s time to talk to your physician. Common symptoms are mood swings, frequent tearfulness, and difficulty sleeping . Your doctor may discuss counseling, support groups, or other options for treatment